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  • Vicky Murray

You don't have to prove anything to anybody

Updated: Jul 2, 2021

And for the ones in the cheap seats (that was me), you do not have to prove anything to anyone. End of. I don't care what anybody says, what socially acceptable 'norms' I am crushing, we are the masters/mistresses of our lives and who we choose to please.


You deserve all the good things


Now, don't take this the wrong way, I haven't turned into an absolute narcissist overnight and I am not encouraging you to either. We have enough of those already! No, I am flying the flag to say - sorry shout: 'STOP APOLOGISING FOR THE SPACE YOU TAKE UP IN THE WORLD'.


Seriously, have you ever set yourself the game of counting how many times you say sorry in a day? It's something the whole household can get involved in. 'Oh, sorry I didn't get the phone first'. 'You burnt your finger on the pan? I'm sorry I didn't swoop in there and save you'. The neighbour couldn't get their usual brand of coconut oil? I'm sorry'. I mean, come on, it's a wonder we're not all sitting at home apologising for not preventing COVID!


Back to my point of not having to prove anything to anyone. I think it's great that Instagram and every WhatsApp group under the sun is gleefully celebrating all the new skills and creations people have finally had the time to do. Really, I do think it's great.


BUT.

Lose the shaming


I don't think it's great that there is a pressure for us to prove our domestic or stock market understanding prowess, simply because we can. Case in point. I do not cook.


Never. Nil, Nada.


I can cook but I choose not too and especially not baking. Do I outsource this job to my amazing husband because I am lazy or unable? No. I'm actually a pretty good cook when I do (read have had to), but he is leagues ahead of me in this skillset. What's more, he ENJOYS cooking.


Does this sit well with my mother-in-law? No, but then again, I don't think I sit well with my mother-in-law so that was a bit of an unfair question (if you're reading this and I have that wrong, I'm happy to be proved so).


The only person who has the right to an opinion on you, is YOU


The point is, in lockdown or more relaxed times, we all fall into this perceived notion that we have to prove things to other people because society or tradition says so.


Well, here's a newsflash for you, WE DON'T.


You can dye your hair luminous pink and wear your underwear on the outside of your clothes if you want to. Will you look different and attract a bazillion glances because of it? Guaranteed. Will you get arrested or cause anyone to die because of it? No.

So with that public service announcement and mini-rant over. What are you going to do for you? What are you going to ditch or make space for now you've realised there are a ton of things you can stop doing to prove things that don't give you the life you desire?

Until next time,


Vicky


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